I think that feminist extremists do not count as feminists. After all, if you are a feminist you are in a way an advocate of equal rights, and to exceed the boundaries of equality is surely not equal at all, right? So AmazingAtheist's video doesn't really apply to actual feminists.
Like a few people have said, women and men have some different physical traits, as well as some minor differences in cognitive performance in certain tasks and situations. However, this shouldn't affect what is offered to people. Men and women should get the same opportunities, but be encouraged to do work that suits their abilities. The male vs female bricklayer is a good example.
Of course, this brings up the question 'how much of a difference in pay or emphasis should be put on gender roles?' I'd argue the bare minimum, such that the pay differences are more of a pleasant extra as opposed to a serious margin, and the emphasis is in subtle actions like workplace arrangement and advertising. Since a lot of people in this day and age have this weird hatred of gender roles like they're still oppressive tools of society, it's probably not a good idea to go any further than that.
The only real problem is payment differences and gender roles have the potential to be abused. In Australia, I've been told of less qualified women being hired in business scenarios over more qualified men without any real grounds. The speculation is that these women sort of act as evidence that the business is 'gender neutral'. This isn't a conventional gender role, but has sort of turned women in the workplace into 'morality tokens' of a sort.
So ironically, this aggressive need for equal treatment has actually created a new inequality in employment. I think. I can't source any evidence on this, so I might just be regurgitating factoids.